Jax will be turning two in less then a month, so I decided to reflect on the past two years as a first time mom. I hope this will help some of you new moms, moms to be and that some of you that have been a mom for years can relate! I would love the hear some lessons you have learned as a mom.
1.It’s way more difficult AND way more amazing than you could ever imagine. Just remember the amazing blessing and favour you have received from the Lord. I am constantly reminding myself to be thankful in everything as a mother, then the difficult times won’t be so hard and you can focus on what an amazing blessing and experience it is to be a mom.
2. Stop Comparing. Every baby is different. Don’t you just want to punch someone if they ask you: ” What!? is he not walking yet, shame?”
STOP COMPARING! It is obviously important to make sure you understand the milestones that should be happening, but it is also a general timeline. Just because your friend’s baby rolled over a couple weeks ago and yours hasn’t, doesn’t mean there is something wrong. ( PS: And if someone asks you or compare their baby to yours, don’t really punch them, hehe. Try to have some grace with them. We are all just moms and are unsure and we want to think that our baby is the best, most beautiful and smartest. SO just take it with a pinch of salt and don’t let it upset you.)
3. Explosive diapers happen at the most inopportune times. When Jax was about 7 months old we went on a trip to the Garden route. I had to do a photoshoot for a client and after dropping me of, my husband, Hugo and Jax were really excited to spend the day in George. They went to the Garden Route Mall and just as he was about to take Jax out of the car seat, it happened! Poop everywhere. I mean EVERYWHERE… So daddy just strapped him back in his seat and drove straight to Mosselbay, on the way phoning my cousin and telling her to start running a bath, he has a major emergency! HEHEHE what a great memory! (shame poor Hugo)
4. Always have a extra set of clothes in the car! Point three justifies this. Hehe. Except for diaper emergencies… When baby is still burping or when they start eating. And when they are toddlers its even more of a necessity!
5. Never judge another mother. Every woman is going through something different and will have challenges at different times in motherhood whether she chooses to show them or talk about them or not. Everyone is just doing their best. If you love your baby and try your absolute best you will be fine. There is no such thing as a perfect mother!
6. Take the time to be with your little one. The laundry can wait. They really do grow up fast! Make time to be with your little one. I can see in Jax’ little face how he appreciates it and that total joy in his eyes, if I just leave everything else and just be with him.
7. Life is not that serious! If you’ve been trough an experience with a sick child or NICU, you will know that there is not a lot that is worse then that and I don’t even wish it for my worst rival! After experiencing something like that, you just learn to enjoy the small things in life and realize that life is not that serious.
8. Not to care so much about others opinions. In fact motherhood just made me care less what people think about me overall.
9. You don’t need all the stuff. If you simplify your life, you will have more room and time for the things that matter the most in life. Having a lot of stuff just makes us more stressed, caring and cleaning for all the unnecessary stuff.
10. Nap times are my most productive times! You know what I’m talking about moms!? This is when I work and do stuff like some kind of flash-superwomen-machine.
11. Give daddy some praise and special time. Hugo is such an amazing dad, that he really deserves to be treated. Just remember moms, dad was there first. If you make him feel special and praise him for what he does, then I guarantee you, he will even be a more amazing daddy and husband.
12. Do things YOUR way. There will be an ocean of opinions. Just be confident enough to do things your way!
13. Relationships change. You will lose friends and you will gain new friends. And that’s okay. The ones that are meant to stay will stay and the ones who are meant to go will go. New ones will emerge that are on the same path as you. Don’t be mad, you also change. Embrace the change.
14. Random tip: Buy clothes that are comfy, easy to dress, big enough to fit over their heads and easy diaper access.
15. Know the saying “Get up, get dress and show up”? It is easy to climb into a little bubble with your baby and never leave home. Get up everyday, dress pretty, do your hair and don’t be afraid to get out there. When they are little it’s easy going to the mall, restaurants and visiting friends….trust me it gets harder!
16. Take as many photos photos and videos as possible. Even on the days, you feel ugly take a selfie with your little one. No matter the double chin in bed, take the picture. They matter, they are moments and they pass so quickly. Enjoy moments and create moments!
17. You don’t need too many toys. Funny enough, babies will want to play with everything BUT their toys. Have a spatula? Tupperware? Pots and pans? All great options 😉
18. Your body will look different. In the end who cares? I have said before if you really see how uniquely beautiful you are, other people will see it two. Again do not compare yourself with other moms! See your own beauty and uniqueness. If you can see this and live this way, you will be a very happy women and a great example for your kids.
19. I do appreciate my mom more and is more understanding, why she is the way she is and do things a certain way. My mom truly is superwomen. She had three very sick children. My brother was paralyzed from the age of three and he past away when he was nine years old. If you are a mom, you can not even imagine, having to loose your child. I think that is something that is just not natural and God did not intend for us.
20. My relationship with God became much closer and my relationship with the world and people much less significant. First of all, how can you not be amazed at our Wonderful God, when you witness the miracle of life? When you feel God carrying you, when your baby is sick and you can do nothing, but pray. You start looking at the world trough different eyes and realize that everything is indeed in God’s hands and what faith truly means. What matters most is your love for God and His love for us. Then life is actually simple and motherhood not that hard!